Dove, Dogs, and Shotguns

October 6, 2009

The Best Firearms Salesman Ever

Filed under: Jokes — Tags: — admin @ 7:57 am

 All across the fruited plain, firearms and ammunition have been flying off the shelves. Americans are stock piling and dealers are reaping the benefits. We owe this to one man, kind of ironic that the only thing he has stimulated was by accident :)

 

NO bama '12

NO bama

 
 
 
 

 

 

 

 

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July 24, 2009

The Perfect Gift (funny video)

Filed under: Jokes, Videos — Tags: — admin @ 7:18 pm

This is the video that  won first place at Cannes.

Perfect for ex-wives!

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June 1, 2009

Only in Texas ….

Filed under: Jokes, Recent News — Tags: , , — admin @ 9:31 pm

Apparently some of the people moving out to the country are surprised during dove season.

I came across this article from WFAA, and couldn’t help but see some humor in it.

Lori Castoldi awoke last week to the sound of gunshots near her Prosper home.

    
“It was all around us. It was frightening,” she said. “I could look outside my front door and see these guys with guns.”

The men swarming nearby fields were hunters firing the first shots of dove season, which runs Sept. 1 to Oct. 30 in North Texas.

And though within the Prosper city limits, state law allows it.

Most cities forbid discharging firearms within city limits. But the state Legislature passed a law in 2005 to prevent growing cities from using such laws to prohibit hunting on large tracts annexed after 1981.

Many residents haven’t heard of the law, police officials say, especially city dwellers following urban sprawl into “the country.”

Also Online
Dove hunters bag birds in field near Fort Worth Treasury Department site
“A lot of the people moving here are from other cities,” said McKinney police Capt. Randy Roland. “They don’t look at their home as being in a rural environment; they see it as a growing development.”

Rutledge Gordon of Prosper, a lifelong hunter, said he empathizes with the people startled awake by early morning gunfire.

“Much like your neighbor mowing his lawn or getting a new roof put on or kids playing soccer at 7 a.m., it could be considered rude,” he said. “But this is a big time for hunters. It’s a kickoff to the season. It’s tradition.”

Calls reporting gunshots bombarded the McKinney, Frisco, Allen and Prosper 911 centers last week.

Two years ago, Frisco police received 25 calls about gunfire at the Frisco Horse Park, which hosts an annual opening day hunt.

Police are trying to educate residents about the law and discern the legal hunters from the illegal ones.

McKinney police have received reports from residents whose houses were stuck by shotgun pellets.

The law allows hunting with shotgun, air gun, BB gun or bow and arrow on tracts of at least 10 acres and at least 150 feet from homes or occupied buildings. Rifles and pistols may be fired on tracts of at least 50 acres.

Regardless of the regulations, Ms. Castoldi thinks it’s all too close for comfort.

“I can’t believe it’s OK for people to do that in a neighborhood,” she said. “I’m afraid for my kids. I don’t get it.”

Mr. Gordon said that if hunters act within the law, they pose no danger to homeowners because the law accounts for the distance that ammunition can travel.

“If someone’s not legal, absolutely call the police. But don’t paint every hunter with a broad brush,” he said. “The people who are not responsible, who are not ethical, make it much harder for me as an ethical hunter.”

The North Texas Police Chiefs Association plans to lobby the Legislature next year to limit hunting in cities, Capt. Roland said.

“We wish it wasn’t allowed in a densely populated area such as McKinney,” he said.

Mr. Gordon opposes such changes. But he offers another thought likely welcomed by people such as Ms. Castoldi. The gunshots should die down soon.

“Most dove hunters go out the first week and then hang it up,” he said. “Within a week or two, 80 percent of those guys will be out of the field.”

State law allows hunting in cities under certain conditions:

• Hunting tracts must be 10 acres or larger and 150 feet from homes or occupied buildings to use shotguns, air guns, BB guns or bows and arrows.

• Tracts must be 50 acres and larger and 300 feet from homes and buildings to use rifles and pistols.

• Weapons must be fired in such a way that the projectiles would not cross the boundary of the tract.

About the law

The law, authored by state Sen. Tommy Williams, R-The Woodlands, was intended to prevent cities from banning hunting on land traditionally operated as hunting leases before annexation. Dove season runs from Sept. 1 to Oct. 30 for most of North Texas.

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May 26, 2009

City Slickers

Filed under: Jokes — Tags: , , — admin @ 9:42 pm

A city guy decided to take up quail hunting. He visited his cousin on the farm and asked to borrow a birddog. The cousin wanted to encourage his city relative so he loaned him the best English pointer in the kennel. The city guy and the fine dog spent the day afield. When they arrived back at the farm house the country cousin inquired how many birds were killed. “Got the limit” said the city boy proudly. “How did the dog perform?” asked country. The city guy replied “Well for the first half of the day the stupid SOB would run up to the covey and lock up with his tail straight out and one foot raised like a statue, but after kicking his ass for about an hour I broke him of that so now he will just jump right on into the birds”

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May 21, 2009

Farmer vs. Lawyer

Filed under: Jokes — Tags: , — admin @ 9:47 pm

From Field & Stream:

Farmer vs. Lawyer joke. (Bird Hunting) 

A big city lawyer went duck hunting. He shot and dropped a bird, but it fell into a farmer’s field on the other side of a fence.

As the lawyer climbed over the fence, an elderly farmer drove up on his tractor and asked the lawyer what he was doing.

The lawyer responded, “I shot a duck and it fell into this field, and now I’m going to retrieve it.”

The old farmer replied. “This is my property, and your not coming over here.”

The indignant lawyer replied. “I’m one of the best trial lawyers around, and if you don’t let me get that duck, I’ll sue you and take everything that you own.

The old farmer smiled and said, “Apparently, you don’t know how we do things in these parts. We settle small disagreements like this, with the Three Kick Rule.”

The lawyer asked, “What is the Three Kick Rule?”

The farmer replied, “Well, first I kick you three times and then you kick me three times, and so on, back and forth until someone gives up.”

The lawyer quickly thought about the proposed contest and decided that he could easily take the old codger. He agreed to abide by the local custom.

The old farmer slowly gets down from the tractor and walked up to the city fella. His first kick planted the toe of his heavy work boot into the lawyer’s groin, which dropped him to his knees.

His second kick nearly ripped the nose off his face.

The lawyer was flat on his belly, when the farmer’s third kick to a kidney nearly causing him to give up, but didn’t.

The lawyer summoned every bit of his will and managed to get to his feet and said, “Okay, now it’s my turn.”

The old farmer smiled and said,

“Naw, I give up, You can keep the duck!”

God Bless the farmers, without them, we wouldn’t have a place to dove hunt!

Time to RELOAD!

Dove, Dogs, & Shotguns

Dove, Dogs, & Shotguns

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